A world without logos
by Joseph Hellsing
Summary: a story of love,betrayal, and ah,screw it its pure insainty.sorry i deleted truth or dare and some insainty but this is the remake.


Disclamer:sadly, I DO own hellsing!

Secret sevrice: say you don't.

Author: will you keep quiet about my ailen army Secret sevrice:yes.

Author:i don't own hellsing, FMA, Fooly cooly,naruto,the boondocks,buger king, but I **DO** own rukra!

Truth or Dare

Characters:Integra,Arucard,Walter,Schrondinger,Jan,Luke,Naruto,Rei,Edward,the Harkonen fairy, and Pip.

One day in the "living room" of the Hellsing house sat Arucard and Seras were drinking beer when a portal opened and Integra,Arucard,Walter,Schrondinger,Jan,Luke,

Naruto,Rei,Edward,the Harkonen fairy, and Pip all fell out the portal in a pile.

Naruto:what the hell!

Integra: dammit! I was almost done with my paperwork too!

Fairy(I'm just writing fairy for the Harkonen fairy) :...MEATY BULLET BATTLE! HALCONEN AND JACKA-

Arucard: shut the fk up!

Schrodinger: let's play truth or dare!

All: ...uuuhhh...why?

Schrodinger: because I quit vorkin' for fatso.

Seras: can someone move this fairy off me?

Jan: he's dead.

Walter:of course he's dead, ninny!

Jan:WWWWWWWAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! he called me a ninny-

Schrodinger: TRUTH OR DARE,NOW.

All:ok,ok.

Seras: k, who goes first?

Integra: ME! MEMEMEMEMEME!

All:WTF!

Integra: I dare Arucard to do the cowboy dance( you know, where the cowboy jumps and shoots his guns in the air)

Arucard: Yes, master. _that_ _mutha_ _fka!_

(Arucard does the cowboy dance and then sits down, humiliated)

Integra: how was it?

Arucard: KILL YOU.

Seras: my turn! I pick shorty!

Edward: WHO ARE YOU CALLIN' SO SHORT THAT AN ANT IS

GODZILLA TO ME!

Seras:sorry...

Arucard: I think I'm deaf...

Edward:bit...I dare Seras to make-out with Big Red here!

Jan:hey,you stole my line!

Seras: ok! (Seras gets up and makes out with Arucard)

Integra: interesting...

Luke: sweet!

Jan:sweet!

Luke: sweet!

Jan:sweet!

Luke: sweet!

Rei: SHUT THE HELL UP!

All O.O...

Rei: what?

All: nothing,nothing...

Naruto: it's my turn, believe it!

Schrodinger: and here comes the insanity!

Naruto: I dare Integra to lap dance Pip!

Integra and Pip: oh yeah/no fking way.

All: you gotta!

(So Integra did and no descriptions ok?)

Pip: nice.

Seras: where's Integra?

Pip:somewhere singing about fairies, I guess.

Fairy: this I gotta see.

Arucard: I thought you were dead!

Fairy: so?

Walter:gaghhhh...

All:AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!...

Integra: I killed all the demons! Yay!

(Integra then commits suicide and gouhls took over the world. Kidding!)

Alucard: die!(He kills integra clone)

Alucard:anyway, I think we finally found a way to survive anything!

Seras: we hired stunt doubles.

Author: no, you guys were mudered by a crazed Integra.

All: WE WERE NOT!

(Seras shoots author and his twin takes his place)

Author: on with the fic!

Jan: my turn!

Seras: oh god.

God: what?

Seras: HUH?

God: what do you want?

Seras:oh...errr...nothingbye!

(God vanishes)

Alucard:well tha-(I'm writing Alucard now because it says that on the official site)

Jan:MY TURNNNNNNN! MYTURNMYTURNMYTURNMYTURNMYTURNMYTURNM-

All:ok,god!

God:stop calling my name!

Jan: I dare Rei to smoke two cigars and drink three beers!

Rei: NO.FKING.WAY.

Jan: you have to, it's a dare!

Rei:alrigh'(rei does it)

Rei: ngh...I..feel.. fun...ny...

Pip:hey rei, do you wanna go to my room we coul-

BAM!

(Rei just wacked pip with a rusty shovel)

Rei:...nghgh...fkin' pedo...p..hil..e..uhhh.

Ed: uh, Rei?

Rei: I love you!(she then glomps on ed)

ed: ahhh!W-

roy essence: fullmetal,be happy you have a girlfriend.

Ed: OH,GIVE IT A REST CONLEL CRAPPER!(Ed breaks image up)

Alucard:well,that was very interesting?

Pip:uhhhh...oh yeah, it's my turn!

Seras:shoot- WAIT NOT LITERALLY!

Pip:oh. I dare everyone to say the name of everyone they like!

All: wha!

Integra: I like-

author:cliffy-

alucard: dammit,NO CLIFFYS!

Author:ok,ok!

Integra: I like luke.

All:WTF!

Integra: WHAT, I LIKE HIM YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH THAT!

Alucard: no. I like seras.

Seras: I like alucard.

Jan:the evil cotton candy is coming! Run!(jan runs into wall)

seras:well,uh...

Naruto:am I even in this?

Seras:yeah.

Naruto:i dare alucard to hit luke upside the head!

Alucard:sure!

THUMP!

Integra: you little bastard!(integra then beats the livin' st outta alucard)

alucard :ow...

Integra: thal'ii teach ya!(she then glomps on luke)

AHHHHH! Wait,cool!

Jan:sleepy faries fly fat...

All:O.O

JAN:WHAT?

Ed:we-(a portal opens and shinji, alphonse, winry, mustang, riza, saskue, sakura, kakashi, ino and gendo all fall out)

all new:WTF?

Seras:wanna play truth or dare with us?

New's: sure.

Ino:my turn!

What, ino-PIG!

Ino: I dare saskue to make out with me!(ino jumps at him and sakura stabs her in the head with a kunai)

ino:aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh...

Alucard: and that's my cue.(alucard sucks her blood and turns her into a draculina)

sakura:you bastard! Now she won't die!

Integra: she can die if you use silver!

Ed: I dare mustang to sing peanut butter jelly time!

Mustang: no way, shrimp.

Ed: BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!

(This conversation had to be censored)

mustang:anyways,(snaps fingers and a banana suit appers on him)

_peanut butter jelly time!_

_peanut butter jelly_

_peanut butter jelly_

_peanut butter jelly_

_peanut butter jelly _

_peanut butter jelly_

_peanut butter jelly_

_peanut butter jelly_

_peanut butter jelly_ _with a baseball bat!_

_peanut butter jelly time!_

_peanut butter jelly time!_

_peanut butter jelly time!_

_peanut butter jelly time!_

_peanut butter jelly time_!

All:O.O O.O O.O O.O O.O O.O O.O O.O O.O O.O

Mustang:what?my turn! I dare ed to sing can't touch me!

Ed:sure!play the music!

_Can't touch me!_

_Cancancancancan't touch me!_

_Can't touch me!_

_Jujujujust like the bad guy from lethal weapon 2,_

_I've got diplomatic immunity, so hammer you can't sue! _

_I can write graffiti, even jaywalk in the streets! I can ride a loop and not give a hoot and touch your sister's tee can't touch me! can't touch me!_

Alucard: what in god's name is he doing?

Ed:_can't touch me!_

Saskue: I believe that's that's the wors-

ed_:stop! It's peter time!i'm a big shot!there's no doubt!light a fire and pee out! Don't like it,kiss my rump! Just for a minute let's all do the bump!_

_Can't touch me!(and _he goes on until its over)

_ed:except for you, you can touch me.(_winrythrows a wrench at him)

ed: can't touch me! At least not now!

Winry:aaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh!

Alucard: more people!(he opens portal and naota,hinata,shino,hakuro,kamon,canti,mamimi,amtmosk,and niamori all fell out)

hakuro:what the fk?

Schrodinger: play truth or dare vith us!

All new:sure,why not.

Schrodinger:truth or dare, mamimi?

Mamimi:both.

Schrodinger:who do you like?

Mamimi:niamori.

Niamori:wha? you're a lesbian?

Mamimi:yeah,so?

Niamori: I am too!

Naota: I dare all you ho's to say who you like!

Mamimi:niamori.

niamori:mamimi.

naota:hakuro.

hakuro: Ta-kun(naota).

ino:SHINO, FOREHEAD GIRL!

saskue:sakura.

naruto:hinata.

sakura:SASKUE, INO-PIG!BEAT THAT!

hinata:n-n-naruto.

shino:ino.

Jan:sweet!(he takes out notepad and writes)

hakuro:whay are you wri-

jan:the evil make-up!

Hakuro:sure...

Gendo:this is **NOT** in the scenario.

Kakashi:i dare gendo to dress up like napoleon dynamite!

Gendo: FINE!(he dress up like napoleon dynamite)

shinji:scary.

Hakuro: I dare Ta-kun to steal all the weapons here!

Naota:fine.(he gets 2 harkoneons,120 AK-47's, a .454 cassul, the 13mm jackal, 300 9mm pistols,

12 bazokas, 20 MP-5's, 400 combat knives,and 13 crosses)

naota:ngargh!gggggrrahhh!grahelp!

Hakuro: nope!(he quits trying)

alucard: my tu-(ANOTHER portal opens and the author and rukra hidestuei,my own character, fall out)

integra: the author!(pulls out AK-47 and pulls trigger)

author:sorry,no!(snaps fingers and flowers fly instead of bullets)

integra: wha-

author: I'm the AUTHOR, I can make you do anything!

Alucard:wwwaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I want my teddy!

Author:see?

Seras:wanna play?

Author:why not.

Alucard: I dare you to sing the barney song!

Author: not a good idea!

Alucard: DO IT.

Author: kay, but I warned you!(I finsh the song and)

rukra:**KILL ATAMOSK!**(she then kills atamosk)

atamosk:ahhhhh...

Author: she kills when she hears the barney-

rukra:**KILL PERSON**!(she then kills an innocent bystander)

author:-song or the name B-A-R-N-E-Y.

All:oh,ok.

Ed:barney!

Rukra:**KILL GENDO!**(you guessed it)

seras: oh my god!

God: stop calling my name!

Seras :kay, sorry.

Jan: my turn!

Seras:ok-wait what!

Jan:I dare seras to marry cotton candy!

Seras:you're insane!

Jan: give me liberty or a TACO !

Seras: here's a taco.

Jan: thanks!

Seras: I put 200,000 packs of hot sauce on it.

Jan:yumm-**BOOM!**(his exploded from esxseive heat)

seras: woah...

Rukra:cool!

Mustang:barney!

Rukra:**KILL MUSTANG!**(I just ain't merciful to anyone in this story, am I)

ed :finally!

Winry: barney sai-

rukra:**KILL DUMB BLONDE!**(no offence to any blondes out there)

winry:AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!(she runs into wall and is out cold)

rukra:good enough.

(walter became 55 years younger, integra married luke, alucard married seras,jan married cotton candy and ate it,mamimi married niamori,hakuro married Ta-kun(naota),ino married shino,naruto married hinata,saskue married sakura,rei married ed, schrodinger married mustang, and rukra killed the priest because a kid said barney.)

Integra: let's all get drunk!(they all get drunk)

saskue:WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!( He is running around naked)

Ino:strange...

Walter:ho!

Ino:WHAT.THE.HELL.DID.YOU.JUST.SAY?

Walter:i'm a pimp named slickback!

Ino:...someone kill me.

Lee:YYYYYYYOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTTTHHHH!

All:WTF!

Alucard: I summoned him here.i'm goin to buger king.OBEY THE KING!

Integra:I want chicken fries or ill hit you with a bat!

Next chapter up soon!R&R or'll lee will live with you!


End file.
